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Majority of divorce seekers in Nigeria cite adultery as reason: lawyer

A jurist, Bukola Ajayi, says adultery is the most common reason given by spouses seeking divorce for the dissolution of their marriage.

“Ninety-five percent of those who file for divorce in court have made allegations of adultery against their spouses,” she said in an interview Saturday in Lagos.

Adultery is the hardest breach of trust in any relationship to forgive, she noted, adding that a large number of marriages have failed because of infidelity.

Adultery is the act of sexual intercourse or flirtation of a married person with someone who is not their spouse.

“The spouse who has remained faithful will feel hurt, angry and betrayed and divorce may be the only solution,” she observed.

She cited lack of intimacy, an unhappy relationship, lack of care, desertion, infertility as some of the reasons cited by spouses who cheat, but argued that these reasons do not justify adultery.

“The act of adultery is just a way of life for some people; no matter how their spouses satisfy them in all areas, they will always cheat,” Ms. Ajayi said.

The lawyer also observed that although adultery is not a crime, some religions and cultures condemn it. “Some cultures find adultery morally wrong while some religions consider it a sin.”

She advised couples not to end the marriage because one partner committed adultery.

“It’s best not to see divorce as a response to a hurting marriage. Divorce will harm your children. It will affect them emotionally and psychologically.

“Do everything in your power to save your marriage. The grass is not greener elsewhere. Life is full of challenges and difficulties. Stay positive about your spouses and try to see the good in them, not the bad.

“Always remember the wedding vows; you promised to stay married forever,” Ms Ajayi advised, adding that counseling is a good option to save marriages.