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Divorce lawyer explains who should pay for the first date

A divorce lawyer on TikTok shares her take on who should pay for the first date, but many in the comments seem to miss the message the lawyer was trying to share.

Justin Lee, a separation lawyer based in Toronto, Canada, is known for sharing relationship advice and dating expertise that can help prevent couples from divorcing.

But not all of his advice was well received.

The divorce lawyer says men should always pay on the first date.

Lee explains that men should pay, but not for the reasons one might expect.

“The problem is when we end up paying for someone who has this real sense of entitlement, like this expectation that we’ll pay. That’s precisely why we always have to pay,” Lee explains in his video.

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He says paying for the date is a great opportunity to watch for red flags.

When the question of payment arises, you can get a good insight into the true nature of the person you are sitting across from. Are their intentions good or will they expect to be pampered all their lives?

“So, let’s say at the end of the date, you pull out your wallet, offer to pay, and your date just sits there, waiting for you to pay, like that’s the obvious course of action.”

“At that point, what did you just learn? You just learned that the person in front of you has the right and frankly the audacity to expect a quasi -stranger pays for it,” Lee explains.

Lee says if you end up paying for your date, who doesn’t offer to pay, you’ve just learned that the person sitting across from you “lacks the basic courtesy to pretend to offer to pay for you. “.

Not everyone was in favor of Lee’s “men should pay first” type of test.

There were negative comments in the comments section of Lee’s video, with a comment saying, “I expect my wife to take care of me. I won’t claim anything.”

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Observing how many people missed his point, Lee doubled down.

“It’s not about who ends up paying, it’s about respecting and appreciating the gesture. Like I said in the video, men will gladly pay – payment isn’t the point.”

“The problem is when women perceive payment as an obligation rather than a kind gesture. Authorized versus Appreciative. Nobody owes anybody anything!”

Lee goes on to explain in her second video, that for women who feel entitled not to pay, it will attract a partner who wants to hold more power in the relationship.

But, he argues, if you want to be equal, showing your appreciation or even offering to pay will help create more balance.

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Kurtis Condra covers entertainment, current affairs and human interest topics for YourTango. He is also a poet based in San Francisco, California. You can follow his poetic journey on Instagram.

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